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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26731015">Distance Closed</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontlookback/pseuds/dontlookback'>dontlookback</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Mayward Week 2020 [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Outer Banks (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, M/M, Misunderstandings, i am at a loss on how to tag this, i used the word yearning in this if that says anything, so i simply won't :)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:35:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,583</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26731015</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontlookback/pseuds/dontlookback</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Mayward Week 2020, Prompt 1: "People are staring." + getting together</p><p>Pope would be okay with yearning for the impossible something more again, if only he got their friendship back.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>JJ/Pope (Outer Banks)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Mayward Week 2020 [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1945528</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>46</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Distance Closed</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Pope wasn’t sure what he had done to make JJ avoid him the way that he was, but he thought he might fall apart if he had to take any more of it. As if being desperately in love with his best friend wasn’t enough torture.</p><p>The worst part was the not knowing <em>why </em>this was happening. JJ had consciously taken himself out of Pope’s life, that much Pope was sure of. It took significant effort to avoid each other. They were so used to doing everything together, be it with or without John B and Kie. They had school together five days a week. It <em>had </em>to have been a conscious decision – there was no way JJ could <em>accidentally </em>avoid him, when their lives were so intertwined.</p><p>Pope just wanted to know the reason.</p><p>A voice in the back of his mind offered him one: his coming out. It had been on his mind for weeks, since he started noticing how much JJ was pulling away from him. It was the only thing that made sense, because it was the only thing that had changed, but at the same time, it didn’t make sense at all. JJ had never been anything other than accepting – it was one of the main reasons Pope loved him as much as he did. JJ was so easy in accepting that everyone was different, so free of judgement when someone didn’t fit into society’s ‘normal’.</p><p>Kie had told them she liked girls, almost two years before. JJ had just said, “Cool, love you. Which movie should we watch?”</p><p>Pope had felt no anxiety about coming out to him because of this. They’d all been relaxing in the hammocks at the Chateau, tired from a long day, and Pope had mentioned it casually. He hadn’t started worrying about it until the day after, which was the first time he didn’t see JJ at all in a full day since… he couldn’t actually remember since when. He’d grown used to having JJ by his side.</p><p>At first, Pope flat-out refused to consider the possibility that his coming out was causing this, but the uneasy feeling grew in his chest as JJ’s absence was growing more and more noticeable. JJ had gone as far as to cancel on going surfing with John B as soon as he’d heard Pope was coming as well.</p><p>It was eating Pope from the inside out, a desperate need to fix whatever he’d done wrong, and a desperate need for confirmation that <em>liking guys </em>wasn’t the thing he’d done wrong.</p><p> </p><p>He woke up on a Thursday morning to find a message from Kie sitting in his inbox, informing Pope that she and JJ wouldn’t be at school that day, and asking him whether he would join them at the Wreck that afternoon. He send back a simple <em>maybe</em> as he contemplated the question. They were used to hanging out together, all four of them, every minute of their spare time. JJ avoiding Pope had impacted all of them, but despite how weird it must have been for Kie and John B, they hadn’t pushed the two to start hanging out again. Pope didn’t hold it against them, but he sometimes wondered if they thought JJ wasn’t doing anything wrong.</p><p>He dragged himself through the day. He sat through excruciatingly boring classes, he took notes without really knowing what he was writing down, he watched John B draw stick figures all over his notebooks.</p><p>Somewhere in between, John B convinced him to come along to the Wreck. Pope didn’t realise he had subconsciously decided not to go until John B slid him a piece of ripped paper. In horrible handwriting, it said, <em>just go, ok? trust me</em>. It was possible, Pope realised, that <em>he </em>had also been distancing himself from the others, to avoid JJ avoiding him. He wasn’t sure what that said about him, but he didn’t like how the realisation felt, when it hit him. He usually prided himself on not being one to run away from his problems. He also didn’t like to be wrong – and so, although the <em>trust me</em> worried him, Pope agreed to come.</p><p>After all, it wasn’t like he was trying to make the problem any <em>worse</em> – he just didn’t think he’d done anything wrong. If he had, maybe this would all be easier. At least <em>then</em>, he’d have something to apologize for. All he had now was a nagging feeling telling him to fix this, somehow, and no idea how to <em>actually </em>fix it.</p><p>He sat through lunch, listening to John B go on and on about how Mr. Crawford from biology was the worst, and some of the tension in his body ebbed away. John B wasn’t acting distant; neither was Kie. They would both be there, that afternoon. If JJ insisted on avoiding him, fine. Pope wasn’t going to let it stop him from having a fun time with friends.</p><p> </p><p>Kie and JJ were already at the Wreck when John B and Pope walked in. They were sitting at their usual table, JJ leaning his chair backwards dangerously, Kie sitting cross-legged on hers. JJ was staring at the table, uncharacteristically quiet from the looks of it, while Kie was talking to him with lots of hand gestures. As he walked closer, Pope caught some of Kie’s words.</p><p>“–him! Rip the band aid off, because right now, you’re being–”</p><p>Pope, who had the uneasy feeling this conversation was about him, was eager to hear more, but John B loudly cleared his throat to catch the others’ attention. JJ’s eyes snapped up to meet them. At the same time, Kie turned around on her chair, her expression going from a mixture of anger and worry to that of a friendly smile in a matter of seconds.</p><p>John B rushed forward to take the seat next to Kie, throwing his schoolbag on the ground in the process – a lone pen fell out and rolled over the floor. Pope stared at it for a moment too long before apprehensively going to sit next to JJ. He hated this, <em>hated</em> the distance that had grown between them. He would be okay with yearning for the impossible something <em>more</em> again, if only he got their friendship back.</p><p>They sat in silence for a few moments before John B jumped on the opportunity and started complaining about the biology teacher again. Pope gave up on trying to follow the complaints, since he’d heard most of them already, and just looked at John B and Kie. Occasionally, when he was feeling brave, he glanced to the side. Every time he looked, JJ seemed more nervous than the last.</p><p>Pope, in turn, grew more and more annoyed. He thought highly of JJ – he always had – but that didn’t mean he wasn’t aware of JJ’s faults. He put up with a lot, when it came to JJ, and he was sure it was the same the other way around, but this? This just angered him. He hadn’t done anything wrong, JJ had ignored him for weeks, so shouldn’t it be <em>Pope </em>being nervous here? What did JJ have to be nervous of, other than his conscious catching up with him?</p><p>Pope huffed before he could think better of it, an annoyed, <em>loud </em>sound. The conversation, which had only really been John B and Kie filling the silence, came to a halt – all eyes on him.</p><p>“I just – I’m only just remembering now, but I’ve left the fridge open, so I should… go fix that,” he stumbled through an excuse, perfectly aware of how ridiculous he sounded, and started getting up.</p><p>“Wait!” Kie stopped him, then turned her gaze. “JJ, weren’t you just about to say something?”</p><p>Pope barely dared to look at JJ. This was something the others had talked about, he realised. He’d known it before, but this was confirmation that Kie and JJ had spoken about what was going on. John B, too, quite possibly. They’d all been talking about this.</p><p>Without him.</p><p>Pope felt like running away.</p><p>JJ beat him to it – he shoved his chair back, pressing himself to the wall to get past Pope. “I can’t do this,” he said as he started walking off, but John B reached out and held JJ’s wrist in his hand, stopping JJ in his tracks.</p><p>For a moment, Pope was sure this was it. JJ, with his limited brain-to-mouth-filter, would spit out whatever it was he had been planning on saying, and at least <em>then</em>, Pope would know. No more questions. A rush of relief washed over him.</p><p>JJ just looked at John B. If Pope hadn’t known JJ so well, he might have been sure the boy was about to burst into tears, but he could count the times he’d seen JJ cry on one hand, so he knew the chances were slim. The fact that they were in a restaurant, a public place where people could see them, reduced those chances to <em>non-existent.</em> JJ, rather than crying, just repeated, “I can’t do this.” He tugged his hand free from John B’s loose grip, and left the Wreck in a hurry.</p><p>Pope was still standing there, blinking. It felt like hours had passed when he finally looked at Kie and John B. They both looked apologetic, but offered no explanation upon his questioning look. He sighed and tried to relive the rush of relief he’d felt upon the prospect of finally knowing what was going on.</p><p>Whether the answers were good or bad, he wanted his mind to be free of questions. He was done overthinking this, and so he walked off to find the only person who could give him the answers.</p><p>Finding JJ was easier than expected – he was standing at the side of the building, leaning against the wall between two windows. Pope went to stand beside him.</p><p>He took a shaky breath. “What is going on, JJ?”</p><p>JJ didn’t look at him, just fumbled with one of the rings he was wearing and stared off into the distance.</p><p>“Seriously? Would it kill you to tell me anything?”</p><p>Again, there was no reply.</p><p>Pope swallowed – there was no avoiding this, really. Not if he wanted to keep any of his dignity. “Okay, I’ll go, then. You’ve been avoiding me for weeks and I’d like to know why, because I’m going insane. What is it I’ve done? Because there’s really only one thing that’s changed, and…” His voice trailed off, because JJ had finally looked up at that, looking – guilty. Pope felt like crying. “So, what, that’s it? Really? You’ve got a problem with me liking boys?”</p><p>JJ finally, <em>finally </em>said something. “Yes. No. Well...”</p><p>Pope felt like crying, still, but he also felt like screaming. “Fuck off. Why. <em>Why? </em>Why could you possibly <em>only </em>not be okay with it when it’s about me? I know you don’t care when it’s other people. I know you don’t care about Kie liking girls. What on earth do you care who <em>I </em>like? It’s not like I’ve got a – a crush on you, or whatever.”</p><p>The words came out in a desperate hope that <em>that </em>was what JJ was worried about. It was a massive lie, of course, but if that was the only problem… Pope could pretend. He could pretend he didn’t like JJ in that way, and he could have his best friend back, and he could learn live with the miserable feeling he got every time he saw JJ stick his tongue down someone’s throat at a party.</p><p>He looked at JJ. JJ looked at him, eyes wide, mouth parted, arms crossed.</p><p>“It’s…” JJ’s Adam’s apple bobbed. “I know that. That’s – that’s the problem.”</p><p>Pope blinked. “Wait, what?”</p><p>“That’s the problem.”</p><p>“<em>What </em>is the problem?”</p><p>“That you don’t have a crush on me,” JJ spit out the words like he’d been holding them back for ages. He looked a little out of breath, avoiding eye contact.</p><p>Pope understood that, because he felt a little out of breath, too. Dumbfounded, he repeated JJ’s words. “The problem is that I <em>don’t</em> have a crush on you.”</p><p>“Don’t you get it?” JJ sounded desperate. His next words came out so fast that Pope had trouble following. “The problem isn’t that you like boys, it’s that you don’t like <em>me</em>, because I like you! I <em>like </em>you, damn it, and I know that you don’t feel the same way but – well, I thought I could handle that, because you were straight, so it wasn’t even in the realm of possibility, but…” He trailed off.</p><p>Pope stared, and stared, and stared, trying to get this information to make sense in his mind. JJ liked him. <em>Liked </em>him. He snapped out of it when he saw JJ press the palms of his hands to his eyes, realising that he was letting the silence between them stretch out for too long.</p><p>Problem was, he didn’t think there were words big enough to bring JJ the joy that he was feeling, the joy that was pumping through his veins like adrenaline.</p><p>He pulled JJ into a bone-crushing hug, instead.</p><p>JJ made a little sound, not quite hugging back, but burying his face in Pope’s neck. Pope could feel JJ’s hair tickle.</p><p>After a while, JJ mumbled, “You’re nice, bro, but… don’t feel like you have to make me feel better, or something.”</p><p>Pope laughed. It was a genuine, real thing – he felt lighter, not realising how weighted down he’d felt, before. JJ raised his head, and Pope pulled away enough to look at him. He still felt himself grinning. “About that, you might want to stop calling me <em>bro</em>.”</p><p>“What?” Confusion was written all over JJ’s face.</p><p>Pope leaned in, but he wasn’t going for a hug, this time. His lips brushed JJ’s, so soft and quick that when he pulled away, he almost didn’t believe it happened at all. Is if to remind him that this moment was, in fact, real, JJ’s expression went from confused to flustered to <em>happy</em> in a matter of seconds.</p><p>“You’re not shitting me, though, right? Because if this is just some joke…”</p><p>Pope almost burst out in laughter. Almost. “JJ, do you know me at all? I <em>like </em>you, I’ve liked you for ages! I was lying about the no crush thing. I didn’t know you liked boys, so I just thought, maybe we could go back to normal if I said that.”</p><p>“I don’t like boys. I like <em>you</em>.” JJ smiled, and Pope was sure it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. “Also, just for your information, people are staring.”</p><p>Pope must have looked confused, because JJ nodded in the direction behind Pope. When Pope turned his head to look, he realised they’d moved to stand in front of the window, in plain sight to everyone in the restaurant. Several heads were turned to their direction, including Kie and John B, who wore identical, smug expressions. Pope couldn’t even be mad at them.</p><p>“I didn’t realise you minded,” he said, tone teasing, as he looked back at JJ.</p><p>“I don’t. Still, maybe a bit of privacy?” JJ winked. <em>Winked</em>. Pope felt seconds away from a heart attack, but nodded. He didn’t move until JJ linked their hands together and walked backwards, pulling Pope along.</p><p>They didn’t get very far until JJ’s back hit another wall, but this time, there were no windows near when their lips crashed together.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thanks for reading, i had a lot of fun with this one!</p><p>this is posted for the amazing mayward week - check out other work on tumblr @maywardweek2020 !</p><p>or come talk to me on tumblr, if you want, @the-pogues :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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